Wednesday, May 21, 2014


Life is short.
It's not really long enough to get everything done and sometimes I think
it's all in vein anyway.  But I have children and a family and I am thankful for
all of my blessings.  I try to live today like there is no tomorrow and make the most
of every moment, but I am also human and need to be reminded.
Unfortunately, I am reminded by seeing tragedy.  Loved ones and friends who lose their lives
in the blink of an eye.  It is a horrible feeling, and yet a necessary one.
I also have the same feelings to be thankful I am alive when I see my children and I hug my wife.
I am thankful to be alive today. I know you are too.
I used to think I would live forever. I never considered the possibility of dying at all.
I was young, dumb and full of you now what.  Years later, I have a healthy dose of humility and awareness. With this awareness comes the understanding that I will die.
We all will die.  That is life.
I try not to dwell on this fact, but I also keep it in the back of my mind at all times.
Sometimes I think it was better when I didn't have a fucking clue, I was so caught up in myself,
I would have never seen it coming.  But thats not true.
It is better to know today and accept this absolute truth in life, than to live selfishly blind.
I don't have to be macabre, just aware.  I want to go peacefully, and I don't have to be old and gray to do so, I just need to be aware and thankful.  If I try and make sure that I don't have any resentments,
haven't done anyone wrong, and I am making decisions based on spiritual principles, I am good to go.
If my life ended today, I could live with that. (yes, pun intended)
Certainly I do not wish for this to happen!! I have plenty of dreams and adventures and life to live,
but I really do not have any control over my demise.  I try my best to not take part in the end......
the list goes on.  But, that still does not keep me from just keeling over right now.
When my time comes, I will have no choice in the matter.
Mostly, my desire to stay alive is strongly based on responsibility.
I have children and a family to provide for, so I cannot die anytime soon.
Whats super ironic is that by the time we figure out how precious life is....we've blown half of it away.

Friends are beginning to go, family members too.
Slowly but surely, people I know are no longer with me physically.
I do believe they are with me spiritually.
I think of the good times we shared and remember them fondly.
I hug my kids and kiss my wife and think I've got it made......if this ends tomorrow, I was a lucky man.
I think that is how I will live the second half of my life, grateful.

"Life gets pretty precious, when there's less of it to waste."  B. Raitt