Thursday, April 27, 2017


My sponsor tells me last week to do some study on "Interdependence".
It is very important in our world and the life around us.
We can never go it alone, even when we think we are doing so......we are not.
In the new day of Patriotism and self reliance, we need now more than ever to be mindful
of our interdependence with each other and our world.
From the Billionaire who says he made it on his own and doesn't want to contribute back
to the society that provided roads and business infrastructure to help achieve all of that money,
to the poorest of the poor who is stuck in a cycle of poverty with fear that there is no other life....
we the people are all connected. We are not only connected to each other as human beings, but we are connected to the animal world, the insect world, the aquatic world and the planet itself.
We are all dependent upon one another and our home, Earth.
We as human beings should care as much for each other as we do for ourselves, maybe more.
When we are doing good but our fellow man is not, that affects us. It affects us spiritually, emotionally and physically. We should be willing to do whatever it takes to help our fellow human beings.  Obviously we get so caught up in getting more for ourselves, we forget about sharing with those less fortunate. We label the less fortunate to make this greed easier to digest.
They are "Lazy" or "Dumb" or "Black" or "White" or "Muslim" or "Christian" or "Democrat" or "Republican". None of these labels actually exist. They are all made up by other fearful men.
Fear of losing control, fear of losing power, fear of losing money.
We disagree on how to help our fellow man, what is the best course of action - but we must not disagree that help is necessary for all.
In the end, when we die we will all go to the same the ground.
What happens on the other side remains a mystery for every single living being on this planet.
No one has the exact answer to life after death, all we can know absolutely is that we will die.
Everyone has a belief that they have acquired through conditioning or experience.
Whatever that belief may be, it is just a belief. It is not certain.
Faith is certain.
"Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see." Hebrews 11:1
With true faith comes humility. I am not certain of the unknown, but I have faith it will all be wonderful. In the end we will all be in the same place. We are human beings, the same species.

Interdependence teaches us that we need each other. We need to help each other and have genuine concern for those around us, not just our close loved ones. We need to love those that we don't understand the most. Pray for them. Help the poor, share what we have with anyone in need.
The oxygen provided on this planet is the only reason any of us are breathing.
If we do things to jeopardize the oxygen, we are jeopardizing our own existence!
Don't let politics separate you from others. Don't let politics make your moral choices.
Love everyone as God loves.
Disagree, but know we are much more in agreement on a molecular level than we are on a political level. Politics is nonsense.

Interdependence is life. Everything, everyone has a place and a connection to one another.
That is truly awesome and amazing.
Everything we do affects everything and vice versa.
We are all truly connected.

"You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. "   The Desiderata - Max Ehrmann

Monday, April 10, 2017


All my life I have been called "sensitive".

I get my feelings hurt easily. Thats what my sisters always told me.
My father said it was because I cared to much what others thought or said of me.
My mother said it was because I had a "tender heart", thats why I was a good singer
and musician.  Emotions were a part of who I was even at a very young age.

I think the word "sensitive" sounds like someone just cries all the time.
But this is not true at all.
The definition of the word sensitive is: "quick to detect or respond to slight changes, signals, or influences."
And of a persons behavior: "having or displaying a quick and delicate appreciation of others' feelings"

I have had musicians I played with, co-workers, spouses, teachers, friends, family and the lot all tell me at one time or another and on many occasions that I was so "Sensitive".

It is true. But it's so much more than just getting my feelings "hurt" or getting upset with someone
because of something they said. It's more based on my "sensitivity" of the situation and others feelings that I pick up on very deeply.  I am aware.
When I was young I could feel the tension that my parents had been fighting and were not happy
with each other, even if I wasn't there when it happened. I could tell something was wrong.
The tone of the voice, the way a person walks, the cold still face that does not smile.
I see it all, feel it all, and it affects me immediately.
Sometimes I wish it did not, it would be so much easier to not "feel" so much of the world around me. I used drugs and alcohol for years to numb that sensation of awareness and feeling, but alas,
I have an allergic reaction to mind altering-mood changing substances.......who knew.

Since I can remember, I have been an antennae for emotion.
I am also just plain old "sensitive".  I want everyone to like me, and when they don't
I get my feelings hurt and I wanna know why.  Many actors and musicians, songwriters and authors
have this same affliction.
I believe it is why we "perform", to seek attention and people pleasing.
We give more of ourselves than most, in hopes that we will get something in return.

When I cleaned up from drugs and alcohol I began a process of eliminating my old personality
and beginning a new.  The old one wasn't working anymore.
What happened was slowly over a period of time I became who I was before I ever used drugs or drank.  I was a child again.
Over the years of early recovery, I spent time with musicians and friends joking and being mean and teasing and getting tough again.  I loved to call someone out and give them shit, I was the toughest
one of all.  If they gave any back I would cut them down with some quick one-liners and they knew where they stood. my recovery continued, I learned that this behavior was juvenile and hurtful and mostly a waste of time and energy.  Why tear others down for amusement? I should be lifting others up. Slowly my behavior changed and I learned to grow up.
Spiritually I was maturing, but I was not "tough" anymore.
When I spent time with my old friends, they behaved as they always did.
When they got to me and gave me a good teasing....guess what?    I got my feelings hurt.
I was still sensitive but I was not tough anymore. The spiritual principles had changed my behavior
and I did not have it in me to fight back with hurtful words.  I did not want to behave this way anymore.  I didn't understand why my friends would want to treat me like this, why would they want
to talk to me this way?
They had not changed, I had, and I was still sensitive.

Once again, it's always me.

I could finally begin to work on my self-centered sensitivity. These people were not trying to hurt me or my feelings at all. They were acting the way we had always acted together, but I had changed.
I was not that person anymore.
So I learned to understand my feelings once more.
Mostly my feelings are connected to my ego and the first feeling that pops up when something
is said to me, is probably the wrong feeling.  My ego wants to get bruised, but I can now decide
how I will react. Mostly I just wait a second and "Think, Think, Think" before I react.
This always works.  It's still a daily operation that deal with, but much much easier today than a year or two ago.

I am still sensitive and will always be that way.
I don't think I want to change that about me. It helps me to write songs and play my music
from the heart.
I will always seek attention, but mostly in a positive way today :)

I have learned to let it go. When something is said to me and it feels hurtful, I just stop a second
and remind myself that I'm crazy and it's probably me and the way I am interpreting the words.
My interpretation is most likely more harmful than the words and intention itself.

Unfortunately, sensitivity and self centeredness are a bad combo.
The idea is to let go of the self centeredness and focus on the outside world around us.
Try and understand that most of it has nothing to do with us, as the world does not revolve
around you or I.
I try today to use my sensitivity for the positive. Writing songs, sharing my feelings, being compassionate and tolerant of those around me. Understanding what others are going through.

If everyone was a little more sensitive to the world around them, it would be much easier
to get along.

Peace, Love, Zito